Cucumbers quotes

Cucumbers quotesCucumbers quotes by topic: People and cucumbers, Pickles and cucumbers, Life and cucumbers, Love and cucumbers, Cucumbers features, Diet and cucumbers, Food and cucumbers, Cool as a cucumber, Literature and cucumbers, Vodka and pickles, Scientists and cucumbers, Spring and cucumbers, Tomatoes and cucumbers, Attitude to cucumbers, etc.

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People and cucumbers

If humans were cucumbers, they would be green behind their ears for life. (Marion Gitzel)

However, friend, people and cucumbers are no good once they are ripe. (Jean Paul)

The cucumber is bitter? Then throw it out. There are brambles in the path? Then go around. That’s all you need to know. (Marcus Aurelius)

As for myself, I am sitting up today for the first time — partly dressed as the cucumber said when oil & vinegar were poured over him salt & pepper being omitted. (Edward Lear)

One day when we had seen a fat pig killed in the barnyard, Hippolyte thought of treating the cucumbers in the garden as such. He introduced them a small wooden skewer in the extremity which, according to him, represented the neck of the animal; then, squeezing these unfortunate vegetables with his foot, he squeezed out all the juice. (George Sand)

Before we get angry with another human being,
let’s imagine a man
in long johns and garter belts
and a woman with a cucumber mask and hair rollers! (Peter Sereinigg)

Pickles and cucumbers

In the last analysis, a pickle is a cucumber with experience. (Irena Chalmers)

I think pickles are cucumbers that sold out. They sold their soul to the devil, and the devil is dill. (Mitch Hedberg)

Once a cucumber turns into a pickle, you can’t turn it back into a cucumber. And I’ve been pickled by the internet for a long time. (Melissa Broder)

Coming from New York, I know that if you go by a delicatessen, and you put a sweet cucumber in the vinegar barrel, the cucumber might say, «No, I want to retain my sweetness.» But it’s hopeless. The barrel will turn the sweet cucumber into a pickle. You can’t be a sweet cucumber in a vinegar barrel. (Philip Zimbardo)

You take them home expecting a nice English cucumber, but regrettably end up with a pickle. (Harlow Stone)

I like a pickled cucumber. A regular cucumber I’m not so interested in. (Jeff Goldblum)

Life and cucumbers

Pickles sweeten life. (Andrea Mira Meneghin)

Life is like a cucumber. One minute it’s in your hand, the next it’s up you ass. (Lawrence Durrell)

He suddenly feels very bad, and ruminates on this proverb matured in a land of pharaohs and pyramids, so far from Nueva Siddhapura, which assures us that «Life is like a cucumber, one day you have it in your hand and the next day, somewhere else! (Patrick Boman)

A cactus is a cucumber deeply disappointed in life. (Evgeny Petrosyan)

The bells sever the flow of time, massacre the dough of duration, chop up the days, like the knife of the Japanese cook the cucumber. (Sylvain Tesson)

Love and cucumbers

A woman needs a man like a tuba needs a cucumber. (Lois Greiman)

To see cucumbers in a dream denotes that you will speedily fall in love. Or, if you are in love, then you will marry the object of your affection. (Richard Folkard)

You know, there is no language of vegetables, which converts a cucumber into a formal declaration of attachment. (Charles Dickens)

Nothing ruins the mood during foreplay more than the recurring image of your sixty-five-year-old homeroom teacher trying to stretch a condom over a cucumber. (Dennis Miller)

Cucumbers features

Heaven is a homegrown cucumber. (Alys Fowler)

The cucumber is about as close to neutrality as a vegetable can get without ceasing to exist. (Waverley Root)

If the cucumber does not sing, And this in any season, It is necessary to believe that, by the will of heaven, Probably, it cannot. (Konstanty Ildefons Gałczyński)

Common cucumbers are there, white, green, greyish, large, medium, small, distinguished by such qualities. (Olivier de Serres)

Diet and cucumbers

My fridge is really just vegan: coconut water, Gatorade (my favorite!), cucumbers, mint, kale, vegetables, ginger, and wheat grass. (Serena Williams)

I just did a five-day raw-food diet, but I’ll never do that again. It’s really hard! I’d wake up in the morning feeling great and go to bed feeling miserable, because dinner would be cucumbers, kale, and dressing. I mean, at the end of the day, if you can’t have a Girl Scout cookie and a piece of cheese, what is life all about? (Amanda Seyfried)

Hey, lettuce and tomatoes,
cucumbers, carrots from the garden,
I’m ashamed of my pounds,
please help me lose weight. (Horst Rehmann)

Food and cucumbers

And I saw a cucumber, the son of the all-glorious Earth, Lying among the herbs; and it was served up on nine tables. (Naucratis Athenaeus)

The apple is a tasty and beautiful fruit, but when it is rotten, it cannot even match the taste of a simple fresh firm cucumber. (Lao She)

The horse does not eat cucumber salad. (Johann Philipp Reis)

Cool as a cucumber

In chess, you should be as cool as a cucumber. (Yuliya Snigir)

I can see my competitors sweating, and I am cool as a cucumber. (Adam Rippon)

I’m cool as a cucumber, baby. (Thomas Middleditch)

Literature and cucumbers

In Lermontov, for example, in order not to go far, no more sense than cucumbers in an acacia. Whole choirs of heavenly bodies, and not a word about electrification. (Vladimir Mayakovsky)

But the older I get, the more my reading behavior resembles that of those who want to grow in the garden: It was like this with the cucumbers last year and the year before last, if I try it this year it will be different, the seasons change, that The weather changes, not in a contemplative but dramatic way, and I’ll stick with the cucumbers for the time being, I know them and I still have something to clarify with them. (Marion Detjen)

Vodka and pickles

There is always a decanter of vodka near the book and a pickled cucumber or a soaked apple right on the cloth, without a plate. (Anton Chekhov)

Russians will consume marinated mushrooms and vodka, salted herring and vodka, smoked salmon and vodka, salami and vodka, caviar on brown bread and vodka, pickled cucumbers and vodka, cold tongue and vodka, red beet salad and vodka, scallions and vodka-anything and everything and vodka. (Hedrick Smith)

Scientists and cucumbers

Scientists since the creation of the world think and they didn’t come up with anything smarter than a pickled cucumber. (Anton Chekhov)

He had been eight years upon a project for extracting sunbeams out of cucumbers, which were to be put into vials hermetically sealed, and let out to warm the air in raw, inclement summers. (Jonathan Swift)

Spring and cucumbers

Ah, neither snowdrops nor crocuses smell of Spring so convincingly in spring, As the first cucumber from the garden smells! (Sofia Parnok)

There was still snow on the roofs. Even Spring laughed, foaming the snow with the sun. A dozen greenhouse cucumbers Was too weak to make clear in March About greenery. But March understood them And trumpeted to everyone about youth and freshness. (Boris Pasternak)

Quotes about spring

Tomatoes and cucumbers

Shall I advise you — About cucumbers and tomatoes Then you can walk straight away — And buy some. (Jo Dantes)

The cucumber and the tomato are both fruit; the avocado is a nut. To assist with the dietary requirements of vegetarians, on the first Tuesday of the month a chicken is officially a vegetable. (Jasper Fforde)

Quotes about tomatoes

Attitude to cucumbers

Cucumber should be well sliced, dressed with pepper and vinegar, and then thrown out. (Samuel Johnson)

— Where can you see such a cucumber! Yevsey went on, pointing to one cucumber, «and you won’t see it in a dream!» trifle, rubbish: here they wouldn’t even look, but there the gentlemen are eating! (Ivan Goncharov)

Cosmetics and cucumbers

Her tiny hands, which remained pretty and which she maintained with cucumber milk cosmetics (Roger Martin du Gard)

A slender, soft hand whose whiteness she knew how to preserve with talcum powder, cucumber pomades. (Théophile Gautier)

Vegetables and cucumbers

Pliny most often takes the cucumber for the melon, confusing these two fruits under the same name. (Olivier de Serres)

Cucumber, squash, pumpkin, and melon blossoms furnish honey and some pollen to the bees in July. (Frank Benton)

Quotes about vegetables

Problems and cucumbers

More down to earth than him, you really had to be a cucumber or a potato! (Marie Décary)

Wainwright’s Fruit Emporium. Mr Wainwright is not able to take calls at this time since he is not right in the head and thinks he is a cucumber. Thank you for calling. (Douglas Adams)

Other

Divide by cucumber error. Please reinstall universe and reboot. (Terry Pratchett)

Sometimes from this hillside just after sunset The rim of the sky takes on a tinge Of the palest green, like the flesh of a cucumber When you peel it carefully. (Robert Hass)

Among the topics of cucumbers quotes, I would highlight pickles, scientists, vodka, tomatoes, cosmetics.

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